ozma914 | Entries tagged with reviews

"Children look like burnt paper. Black. Not moving. And then the blast wave hit them, and then they fly apart like leaves."

Wow. Yeah, those are pretty downer first lines, which I guess you'd expect from a movie called Terminator: Dark Fate.

The good news is, Sarah Conner (played once again by the fantastic Linda Hamilton), really did manage to stop Judgement Day, and the destruction of civilization by a rogue artificial intelligence called Skynet.

The bad news is, it only led to an entirely different destruction of civilization by a rogue artificial intelligence--called Legion. Now an entirely different terminator, the Rev-9 (played by Gabriel Luna, the memorable Ghost Rider on "Agents of "SH.I.E.L.D."), has arrived in 2019 to kill a young Mexican woman, Dani (Natalia Reyes), because ... reasons.

Luckily, another savior from the future has also appeared: An augmented human named Grace (Mackenzie Davis). The beats seem similar to other Terminator movies, especially the second one, which this movie is a direct sequel of. (Apparently the others happened in a different timeline, which for this franchise is easy to believe). We establish the happy young Dani and her family, Rev-9 shows up, Grace drags Dani to safety, big chase begins.

And then, when all seems lost, we get a bad ass appearance by the bad ass Sarah Conner. And how did Sarah know where to find this new threat? That's the next mystery to be solved, and Sarah isn't going to be at all happy with the solution.

What's that, you say? Arnold what's-his-name? Yeah, he shows up eventually, as a T-800 that's just a little ... different ... from the previous ones.

For the first half of the movie, though, it's an all-girl-action-hour, with three bad-ass women saving and occasionally threatening each other, kicking other ass, and not even bothering with the name taking. I heard one critic complain about the movie being "woke". Yeah, I suppose so. But if I had to go into a fight, I'd take these three along with me, any day.

My biggest complaint with Terminator: Dark Fate is that it seems to make many of the events of the first two movies pointless. Sarah and her family saved the future, but--oops--it's going to be destroyed, anyway. My second biggest complaint is that some of the action sequences were a bit long, but they certainly were attention grabbing.

Rev-9 is a new kind of Terminator, with one particular new skill that's an especially cool development, and its played well by Luna. There are no real complaints about a skilled cast, who I'm sure had to do a lot of emoting toward a green screen. The story is no great departure from previous Terminator movies, but there were some nice twists along the way. It's not the best Terminator movie--that would be the second one--but it's far from the worst, and well worth seeing.

There's something about women with rocket launchers.

My rating:

Entertainment Value: 3 1/2 out of 4 M&Ms. A scene not long after Sarah appears bummed me out, but overall it was lots of fun.

Oscar Potential: 1 out of 4 M&Ms. I don't think so. Loved the special effects, but who doesn't have good special effects, these days?

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I wasn't certain there was any point in reviewing Code of Honor, considering it was published eighteen years ago. (!) But hey, I did read it this year, and later learned it's still available on Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Code-Honor-Americas-Harlequin-Superromance/dp/0373708823

It's also up on Kindle, but I had the paperback edition sitting around. I first read romances around 1990, a few years before I started writing them, but all my life I've been picking up any book I could find about firefighters; this qualified both ways.

The paperback version.

Code of Honor is one of Harlequin's Superromances: Extra long stories with a bit more depth and more subplots to them. Fire Lieutenant Jake Scarlatta was stabbed in the back by his best friend, a fellow firefighter, and now has trust issues. Firefighter Chelsea Whitmore has been assigned to Jake's station, but she's now a pariah on the fire department after an affair with another firefighter led to disaster. Oh, and she now has trust issues.

Trust issues are a big deal in romances, especially when there's no other logical way to keep a couple apart. In this case Jake and Chelsea have something else: He's her supervisor. But even while fighting off their growing attraction Jake is a fair guy, and fights to give Chelsea every chance. The only problem is, she keeps making rookie mistakes ... mistakes she insists she isn't making. Sabotage? It appears someone at the station is less open minded than Jake is.

Female firefighters aren't as big a deal these days, but this was written about twenty years ago. To put it into perspective, the book came out less than twenty years after a lawsuit forced the hiring of the first female New York City firefighters; in the words of the old ad, you've come a long way, baby.

Overall Code of Honor is well done. Getting the casual reader up to speed on the fire service leads to some clunky writing here and there, especially early on, but the plotting and description is strong, as is the characterization. I had two major problems, the first of which was my own fault for not noticing: Code of Honor is part of a series, and not the first book in that series. As such, I had some confusion as characters dropped in who'd already been established in earlier works. The lesson? Always read them in order, kids.

And, Kindle.

The second problem will go unnoticed to most readers. Shay clearly did her research on the fire service, and she got a lot of stuff right. But sometimes, for the sake of plot, stuff happens that just wouldn't happen. In one example, a crew arriving on the third alarm--in other words, after several other crews are already at the scene--advance a hose from their truck toward a large building fire, then run out of water when the truck's tank runs dry. A dramatic problem, except it wouldn't happen: Assigned to the third alarm, they probably would have taken a hoseline from one of the already-arrived units. If not, they'd have established a water supply from a hydrant or water tanker before making an attack on a fire that big.

Realism in entertainment is a problem with every profession: It's why I don't watch most firefighting shows, and I'd bet most lawyers don't watch lawyer shows, either. But overall if you like romances, you'll like this one. (Romances have also come a long way, baby, but we all have our preferred genres.)

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Which came first? The DC Captain Marvel, or the Marvel Captain Marvel?

The answer is neither, kinda. Here's the full scoop:

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vision/captain-marvel-shazam-share-a-strange-past-1199825

Here's a quick recap: Captain Marvel came along in 1939, one of the very first superheroes and, for a time, one of the most popular. Put out by Fawcett Comics, the title outsold Superman and led to a whole family of Marvels who were called, collectively ... ahem ... the Marvel Family.

But National Comics Publications decided Cap (yeah, some called him that) was a rip-off of their creation, Superman, and the resulting lawsuit dragged on for twelve years. (Captain Marvel didn't shoot lightning bolts at the time, and his powers really were similar to Kal-El's. Their alter-egos were both news people, and their big adversaries were both bald evil scientists.)

By the early 50s superheroes were losing popularity, so Fawcett caved and just buried their hero forever. Or at least until 1973, when the Big Red Cheese (as his arch enemy called Captain Marvel) was bought by DC--formally National Comics. But by then Marvel had their own Captain Marvel--in fact, there have been at least six variations of that name, by at least four different publishers, if you include Captain Marvel, Junior.

So DC started calling their guy Shazam, at least on the cover, which meant he could never actually identify himself. "Hi, I'm Sh--um, let me write it down for you."

When I last read comics regularly, Captain--um, Shazam was a member of the temporarily more humorous Justice League, which was also my favorite incarnation and darn, why couldn't they have kept that humor in the DC movies? For Shazam! the movie they went back to that, getting humor from the fact that the red-clad superhero remains, underneath it all, a fourteen year old kid.

Whew. Lotta history going on.

Although I didn't realize it, Shazam! sticks closely to newer details introduced when DC made major changes in its lineup. The story still features Billy Batson (Asher Angel), an orphan who keeps running away from group homes in search of his mom. One day a Philadelphia subway takes him to a way unexpected stop: the lair of an ancient wizard (Eijmon Hounsou, who ironically was also in Captain Marvel) who's been unsuccessfully searching for a pure heart to take his power. Billy ... will do.

Unfortunately, one of the wizard's previous rejections, Dr. Sivana (Mark Strong) successfully finds the lair, and gives in to temptation there (a demon orb, which really should have been in a safe). Now he also has superpowers, along with a cadre based on the Seven Deadly Sins, and is seeking to take Billy's new power for himself.

The joy of the film is in seeing the full grown Shazam (Zachary Levi) learn and deal with his powers, while still acting like a boy in his early teens. Joined by another orphan, Freddy (Jack Dylan Grazer), they experiment, have fun, and go just a bit overboard, until Shazam is brought back down to earth by his first honest to goodness villain, played straight and scarily by Strong.

Doctor Sivana, now and not quite so now.

As is my habit, I won't go much into the rest of the plot, but suffice it to say there's plenty of action and fun. However, I'd hesitate to let little kids go; the Seven Deadly Sin monsters are pretty darned scary, and there's a (funny) subplot involving Santa Claus that might not go over well with those who still believe.

It's a can't-miss cast, some of whom I can't describe because--spoilers. Special credit should go toward Billy's new group home family, including a group of awesome kids (and we all know kids in movies can sometimes be the opposite of awesome). My wife and I were especially happy to see a couple of favorite actors from favorite TV shows, although I won't describe who just in case others might get the same fun surprise we did.

Levi does an amazing job of bringing out the fourteen year old in the adult body, and he plays well with the ultra-serious Strong. There are plentiful shout-outs to the comics, but for the most part they don't interfere with the enjoyment for those who weren't already fans.

My Rating:

Entertainment Value: 4 out of 4 M&Ms. I'm not sure you can compare comic book movies these days, any more than you could compare, say, a romantic comedy to a romantic drama. I think I enjoyed this more than the other Captain Marvel, but wouldn't say it's better overall. Either way, I had a blast.

Oscar Potential: 1 out of 4 M&Ms. It's a great movie for what it is, but doesn't try to take itself seriously--which is the kiss of death as far as Hollywood recognition is concerned.

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Book Review

Rendezvous With Rama

by Arthur C. Clarke

Many years ago I had a bedtime ritual: Prop myself up on some pillows and read a chapter or two of a book, while eating a Nutty Bar. Don't judge me, Nutty Bars are yummy. One particular evening I started a ten year old novel by Arthur C. Clarke, for a little reading time before sleep.

Only I didn't sleep much that night. I finished the book in the wee hours of the next morning.

Still, sometimes things aren't as good as you remembered, so thirty years later I once again picked up Rendezvous With Rama, this time with some trepidation. Would it hold up to my memories?

It did. Although this time it took me a few days to read, what with adult responsibilities and all.

Rendezvous With Rama begins when astronomers discover an asteroid that turns out to be from outside the solar system; it's roughly cylindrical, spinning, and moving at a pretty good clip as it prepares to pass closer to our Sun than the orbit of Mercury. You'd be forgiving for having a sense of deja vus at this point, since in 2017 astronomers, for the first time, discovered an asteroid coming in from outside our solar system ... roughly cylindrical, spinning erratically, and passing closer to our Sun than the orbit of Mercury:

https://www.theverge.com/2017/12/18/16788354/oumuamua-interstellar-asteroid-outer-layer-ice-interior-comet

Arthur C. Clarke was always a bit ahead of the game.

This is the edition I have now--a book club version with a nifty pullout illustration.

Unlike the real version, the book's asteroid turns out to be anything but: It's an artificial construction thirty miles long, moving so quickly that only one spaceship is in a position to intercept it. Having been on the move for possibly hundreds of thousands of years, the massive ship is dead and silent, but there still might be secrets to uncover inside.

When the crew of the survey vessel Endeavour manages to get inside the newly named Rama, they find a dark, cold, and dead world. But they also find a breathable atmosphere, a frozen sea, and incredible architecture held to the inside surface by the spinning craft's centrifugal force.

Then the lights come on ... and it turns out Rama isn't quite as dead as anyone imagined.

https://www.amazon.com/Rendezvous-Rama-Arthur-Clarke-Collection-ebook/dp/B01IA89F9U

Did I mention the nifty pullout illustration?

Here's the thing about Rendezvous With Rama: If a new writer submitted that novel to a publisher today, it would probably be rejected. It has little conflict between the characters, who tend to be rather two dimensional. It flows more like a series of wonders than a plot, in a way that reminds me of Jules Verne's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. There aren't really any bad guys here, except in one case in which a certain group of peoples' motives were, to me, a little shaky. Several scenes are set in a meeting where the members spend most of their time just speculating on what's going on.

So why is it still a page turner? Nobody could put the science in science fiction like Clarke. He manages to describe complicated landscapes and concepts in a way that's interesting, but still keeps the story cooking along at a good pace. He's one of those writers who can make exposition fascinating.

That's not to say there's not plenty of action too, as the human crew makes its way into the unknown, and encounters things that may, or may not, be out to get rid of intruders. The explorers encounter challenges and surprises galore, and Clarke does his usual great job of making an incredible thing both credible and scientifically accurate. It's as much a page turner today as it was the first time I read it, and holds up perfectly. It would make a great movie in the right hands (and a really stinky one in the wrong hands).

Also, it has one of the great twist closing lines in all of literature.

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Odd Thomas sees dead people. Walking around like regular people. They only see what they want to see. They don't know they're dead.

Wait, I thought the kid's name was Cole. The Sixth Sense, right?

But no, this is a novel by Dean Koontz, and also a great example of how there are no new ideas: Just new, unique, and fun ways of examining old ones. Odd Thomas does indeed see dead people, but that's one of the more normal aspects of Odd, and of Koontz's amazing novel.

My adventure came when my wife brought home a stack of used Koontz novels. I've seldom read his books, and had no real opinion about them, one way or another. The first I liked; the second I didn't much care for. Then came Odd Thomas, which kept me enraptured in a "do I really need to sleep? Do I have sick days available at work?" kind of way.

I was late to the party: There are six Odd Thomas books and a movie version of this one, dating back fifteen years. To demonstrate whether I liked it: I've already finished the first sequel, Forever Odd.

In the best "strange characters in a small town" fashion, Odd is surrounded by the unique occupants of Pico Mundo, California. Koontz's idea of a small town is a population of forty thousand, which really small town people like me regard with amusement, but never mind. Also in the best entertainment fashion, Pico Mundo seems to have a very high percentage of murders and other violence--where's Jessica Fletcher when you need her? As the story opens Odd encounters a little girl, who seems perfectly normal except that she can't speak.

In Odd's world, the dead don't talk. By the end of the first chapter he's used his psychic powers to identify the girl's killer, and the chase is on.

Despite his talents Odd is a short order cook. Because of his powers, really, because he's an unusually aware twenty-year old and knows that without order and routine, his ability would overwhelm him. He's madly in love with his childhood sweetheart, Stormy Llewellyn, he's the helpful sort you'd dream of having as a neighbor, and he's known around town as a great--but strange--young man. Only a few people, including the Police Chief, know of his psychic talents.

But in the course of one day his life is disrupted even beyond his own experiences. Odd finds himself chasing after a suspicious newcomer, and it leads him to supernatural madness, murder, and the knowledge that in less than a day something horrible is going to happen to the town he reluctantly protects.

I just realized how impossible it is to actually describe Odd Thomas. You have to experience it. To a large extent it's all about the style, in a book written as an after-the-fact account by Odd himself.

Odd Thomas is a weird and wonderful mix of action, thriller, and humor, the kind of well-crafted work that reminds one of Terry Pratchett or Neil Gaiman. It makes fiction writers like me insanely jealous. It's the kind of book that only established writers can get away with, especially when Koontz fills in backstory by having Odd just tell you what the backstory is. Yeah, he gets away with it, and also with that kind of colorful description that's gone away a little too much in today's literature. But what he gets away with is awe-inspiring.

No, I have no idea if the movie is any good ... but I'll probably watch it, anyway.

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So ... you've probably heard of this book, which has garnered some moderate success from an otherwise unknown author by the name of George R. R. Martin. Long-winded fantasy? Who does that anymore?

My wife and I were planning two long trips this summer, so we headed to the library to find an audio book that wouldn't make the dog howl like a direwolf. We were somewhat taken aback by Game of Thrones, an audiobook roughly as thick as the U.S. tax code. It was on 28 disks.

Twenty-eight.

Winter is coming. Maybe they could get some heated cushions for that uncomfortable iron throne.

Over a two week period we were on the road for roughly 26 hours of driving, and we still had to renew it from the library for another few weeks.

Game of Thrones opens with an execution, and believe me when I saw that's far from the only death to come along. The story follows nine viewpoint characters on a world where summers can last decades but winter hits hard, where dragons once flew, and where a giant, centuries old ice wall protects the continent of Westeros from the supernatural dangers of the north.

Most of the story revolves around the Stark family, led by Lord Eddard "Ned" Stark. After a long war, Ned's best friend Robert has become king of an assemblage of former nations, and now wants the reluctant Ned to be the King's Hand--basically the guy who does all of his dirty work. The honorable and dutiful Ned--you won't find a lot of characters like that here, outside of the Stark family--packs up and dives into the politics of an increasingly divided kingdom.

What could possibly go wrong? In Martin's world, pretty much everything. Tragedy, misunderstandings, treachery, and accidents ensue, as various characters give and take allegiance while others plot for power and ... well, pretty much just power. Despite Ned's desire to just go home, he finds himself entangled in events that will bring war to their world, even while winter nears and evil from north of the wall approaches. Meanwhile, the former royal family of the kingdom plots to take back what they consider theirs.

Sound complicated? It is. You can find dozens of maps online, just to show people where all the lands and cities are, and character trees to make interrelationships a little more clear. There's also plenty of nastiness, from graphic violence to child endangerment to incest. It's dark, detailed, and horribly addictive.

Emily and I were still catching our breaths when she took the audiobook back to the library. She returned with a new book, this time on good old fashioned paper, and I later determined it was five times as long as my first published novel.

Also useful in knocking out burglars.

Yep. Second book in the series, A Clash of Kings. We haven't seen the TV series, but my biggest warning about the world of A Song of Ice and Fire (which is the name of the entire book series) is that you should maybe schedule some vacation days before you start reading.

HBO covered this book in seasons three through twelve.

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Scott Lang is just a normal guy who used to be a superhero, until he broke the law and the law made him a deal: Two years of home detention, a few more on probation, and he's a free man. Oh, as long as he never again puts on that Ant-Man super suit. Now he's only days from getting his detention bracelet removed, so all he has to do is relax, play with his daughter, and he's home free.

I think we all know Scott's not free.

"So ... Ant-Man is also the giant guy? Does he have to change his name?"

Suddenly he's reunited with Dr. Hank Pym and his daughter Hope van Dyne, both still mad Scott used the suit they gave him to go fight the Avengers in Captain America: Civil War. It seems they've discovered a way to rescue someone they thought long lost, and they need Scott to do it. But in advancing their mission, the trio runs afoul of the Feds, mobsters, and a mysterious figure whose powers can be predicted from their name: Ghost.

Ant-Man and the Wasp is one of those projects--like most Marvel movies--that was only doable in recent years, when special effects finally caught up with the vision of movie makers and comic creators. Not that movies haven't managed without it before: check out The Incredible Shrinking Man, from 1957. But when modern effects are successfully balanced with story and character, the results can be spectacular.

Ant-Man and the Wasp manages that pretty well. We get giants menacing ships, quantum level adventures, and everything in between, including one in which a Pez dispenser is used as a weapon, and a big Hot Wheels product placement that fits into a fun and somewhat unusual chase scene. No matter how good they might have made anything else, I just don't see how they could have pulled this story off without modern effects.

"Wait a minute. I have wings and a stinger, and he gets first billing?"

Having said that, they do pretty well otherwise, too. A lot of that is thanks to a solid cast including Paul Rudd and Evangeline Lilly as the title characters, and Michael Douglas as Hank Pym. Look for Michael Pena having a lot of fun, Randall Park as a befuddled FBI agent, Hannah John-Kamen as one of the more tragic figures, and little Abby Ryder Fortson, who tended to steal her scenes through shear cuteness as Scott's daughter.

Do NOT stay for the two mid/after credit scenes. They change the tone of the whole movie from fun to depression, although they do fit the movie into the Marvel Universe.

Seeing Douglas, Laurence Fishburne, and Michelle Pfeiffer makes me wonder at how much more willing the big quality names in Hollywood are to do comic book movies, now. (Of course, Pfeiffer once visited the DC universe.) The wide net of fantasy/SF will probably always get snubbed by the Hollywood elite even as they're scooping cash out of the cows (not literally--ew); but the genre's being taken more seriously than when I was a kid.

"This scene feels a little drawn out."

My score:

Entertainment Value: 3 3/4 out of 4 M&M's. No ... thinking back on the scene with Michael Pena's character under truth serum, sent that up to a full four.

Oscar Potential: 2 1/2 out of 4 M&M's. There were some good performances here, not that the Academy would ever stoop to acknowledge them, but mostly there should be some consideration for effects.

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At the end of The Incredibles, fourteen years ago (!), the Parr family--basically an animated version of the Fantastic Four--defied a ban on superheroes. The movie ended on a cliffhanger with the appearance of a new villain, the Underminer, and they went into action against him.

That was one long cliffhanger. So long that the voice actor who plays Dash Parr had to be replaced, because he grew up.

The family that plays together ... should probably have good insurance.

The beginning of Incredibles 2 picks up right where the original left off, and in the resulting battle against the deep tunneling bank robber, half the city gets damaged. Unfortunately, supers are still outlawed, so Bob and Helen Parr and their three kids are rewarded for their heroic acts with arrest and looming homelessness. But just as they hit bottom, the family is rescued by a wealthy brother and sister duo who, due to tragedy in their past, are determined to make supers heroes again.

Incredibles 2 is fantastically animated as a 60s spy adventure, only with James Bond sidelined while his wife Elastigirl--because she tested better for the PR people--is let loose to prove the worth of supers. Scored with style by Michael Giacchino, it looks a lot like how people in the 50s probably envisioned the 70s would appear, with sleek homes and round TVs. As Elastigirl, and later the rest of her family, tries to figure out who's sabotaging her efforts, we get some smashing action sequences.

But all good stories are about people, of course. Elastigirl is at heart Helen Parr (Holly Hunter), who isn't really comfortable leaving her family to fend for themselves, even though she's having a blast. (She also provides the heart of the movie.) Bob Parr (Craig T. Nelson), Mr. Incredible to everyone else, struggles hard--and comically--to be a stay at home dad and to keep his wife from finding out how badly he's failing at it.

"I'm off to work ... don't wait up."

Meanwhile their daughter Violet faces a rough first date, baby Jack-Jack has suddenly begun developing powers of his own--a lot of them--and Dash is ... well, Dash is an adolescent who can move at super speed, like most adolescent boys. Although aided by family friend and fellow super Frozone (Samuel L. Jackson), Bob has his work cut out for him.

Incredibles 2 is a delight, the exact combo of fun and funny that makes you want to grab the kids or grand-kids so you have an excuse to watch it yourself. (The grand-kids had fun, too.) Just beware that in the course of his dastardly deeds, the villain Screenslaver unleashes some strobing visual effects that could trigger seizures in those so inclined.

"New math? Can't I just take on Dr. Doom, instead?"

The other warning I might give is that there are going to be kids at the theater, and kids will be kids. If you don't have the patience for that you'll find Incredibles 2 just as good when it reaches the small screen, although the visuals won't be as cool.

My score:

Entertainment value: 4 out of 4 M&Ms. There's an encounter between Jack-Jack and a raccoon that's honestly worth the price of admission, all by itself.

Oscar potential: 3 out of 4 M&Ms. Best score? Best animation? Best fun?

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As all fourteen of my regular readers know, I'm easily entertained. Butterflies, flowers, dumb eighties sitcoms, there's a good chance I'll sit through them all as long as they're not Kardashian-type "reality" TV shows.

So yes, I was entertained by Solo: A Star Wars Story, and would definitely watch it again. But I'm also not dumb (shut up, I'm not), and I know when a movie has serious flaws.

Even when I can't figure out what they are.

"Who's the girl? Does Leia know about this?"

Let's face it, as soon as you heard the name of this movie you knew what it would be about. Sure enough, we get an origin story, with Alden Ehrenreich playing a young Han Solo trapped on his home world, which seems entirely taken over by spaceship building industries. (On a related note, the Star Wars universe is even worse than other science fiction ventures in having a world be just a region. A desert world, a snow world, a city world ... don't any of these planets have other continents? How does an entire world have just one climate?)

Han is a small time crook who, even back then, should never be told the odds, and he just wants to get off-planet with his girlfriend (!) and become a pilot. But things go horribly wrong, and now he's sworn to return after joining the first organization that will give him the pilot training he needs. Not his first bad decision, and not his last.

Although there are surprises along the way, the rest of the story pretty much hits the beats we expect: Han makes friends with a big walking carpet, meets a certain charming swindler who owns a certain ship, gets a gun, learns not to trust anyone, gets first shot at the Kessel Run, so on, so forth ...

It is fun seeing the way some of our beloved conventions about Han come about, and there are indeed some surprises along the way. And a few big surprises. (One of my favorites was finding out just how the Millennium Falcon ended up with such a superior navigation computer.) Yes, "fun" fits--it was fun, and I'll happily sit down to watch it again.

"Chewie, change the light bulbs!"

But Solo: A Star Wars Story just didn't ... gel. For one thing, the movie seemed too dark. I don't mean in tone--I mean it literally seemed dark for long portions of the film--maybe it was the theater where I saw it. The effects and score were good, but not great, which also covers the plot and just about everything else. Alden Ehrenreich did a credible job, but do you want to be the guy who follows Harrison Ford? Me neither.

The rest of the cast did well, especially Woody Harrelson, Emilia Clarke, and Donald Glover, who, despite what others have said, made a great Lando Calrissian. We also get Paul Bettany, who's provides us a fun villain in Dryden Vos.

"If this doesn't work out, I'm thinking of playing Indiana Jones."

I suspect if it had been made independent of a franchise, Solo: A Star Wars Story would be considered good space opera. But it wasn't, and as Star Wars movies go it seems weak ... not to mention a whole movie should have been devoted to Han and Chewie forming a friendship, rather than a few scenes.

My Score:

Entertainment Value: 3 out of 4 M&Ms. Great action sequences, good cast, missing the heart that made the early Star Wars movies so great. Hardcore Star Wars fans have devolved into a mutual hatred society, so I might have liked it more because I'm more of a casual fan.

Oscar Potential: 1 out of 4 M&Ms. Ain't gonna happen.

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I just added in the vampire part, but if you want me to write a book with vampires, hey -- I'm game. Not literally game. I suppose I should specify, with vampires.

But seriously, this is a call for all of you who've read our books to please, please, give us a review. Amazon, Goodreads, wherever--authors these days live and die by reviews, and hey--I don't want to die. Not without a review.

(I've heard Amazon is zapping reviews that aren't "verified"--in other words, from Amazon buyers. I guess that makes Goodreads a place to go for getting them counted.)

There are several websites I've checked out, with the idea of posting ads for our books on them; especially Radio Red, the newest, which has been getting little traction even though my publisher has it up on the Simon & Schuster website. (If you're not aware, they're a very big publishing house, which is distributing all my romantic comedies via e-books.)

The problem is, websites devoted to helping writers with publicity are being overwhelmed with requests right now. As a result, many of them won't take on your book unless it has a certain amount of--yep--reviews. In other areas *coughAmazoncough*, word is some websites use algorithms that keep your book from getting noticed until, well, it's noticed, and reviewed. Catch-22? Yep. I wonder how Catch-22 would have done in modern times?

I guess I could have just shortened this to: Please, send in some reviews of whichever of our books you've read, and make sure they're honest ones, no pulling punches. I have zero dollars in my bribery budget, so we might as well have the truth. If we get, say, ten new reviews overall, good or bad, I'll ... I'll ... hm ....

Oh, I know! I'll record a video of me reciting one of my own poems, and post it for all to see. Yep.

Guess I'd better go write a poem now, just in case.

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I didn't catch this when it first came out, but here's another review of Hoosier Hysterical ... and new reviews make this Hoosier hysterical:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/customer-reviews/R2TAWWSKJVFMO1

It was actually posted the last day of 2016, which means I'm still waiting for the first review of this year. Remember, to authors reviews are like chocolate: Sure, in theory you could have too much--but it very rarely actually happens.

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I’m still playing catch up, but I wanted to point out that so far this year “Storm Chaser” has received two new reviews:

http://www.amazon.com/Storm-Chaser-Mark-R-Hunter-ebook/product-reviews/B0056U41F4/ref=cm_cr_pr_top_recent?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=0&sortBy=bySubmissionDateDescending

Remember, whenever you review one of my works, a book fairy gets its wings. Nothing is quite so depressing as a wingless book fairy.

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I love a good time travel movie.

Wait, didn’t I already say that in a previous review?

“Edge Of Tomorrow” sounds like a daytime soap opera, but it’s actually a rollicking fun science fiction about a cowardly military officer (Tom Cruise, at his better), who’s forced to participate in a battle against aliens taking over Europe. After saying the wrong thing to a general, Major Cage finds himself a private in a techno battle suit, crossing the English Channel to invade, yes, Normandy.

(The movie was released on the 70^th anniversary of D-Day, the Allied invasion of Normandy during World War II. Coincidence? Duh.)

Soldiers expecting a cakewalk instead are ambushed and massacred, in a thankfully not too gory but plenty scary scene. Cage has just enough time to glimpse a female soldier wielding a huge sword before a spinning, tentacle alien … kills him.

Wait … huge sword? Techno battle suits? Yep, “Edge Of Tomorrow” is based on a Japanese manga, with Normandy filling in for Tokyo. (“All You Need Is Kill”, by Hiroshi Sakarazaka.)

But a last second encounter gives Cage a do-over—I did mention this was SF, right? He wakes up the previous morning, and finds himself going through the same crap all over again, with the same outcome. Then he wakes up again. And again.

After a while, he gets better at fighting through sheer repetition. Then he discovers exactly one other person who believes his story, because it happened to her—and she just happens to carry a big honkin’ sword. Now all they have to do is make it a little further off the beach, time after time, until they track down the Big Bad alien and kill it before the human race is wiped out. No pressure.

Time travel’s hard to pull off well, and it’s especially hard not to bore the audience to death with “Groundhog Day” style repetition. Taking a cue from the Bill Murray, this warlike version plays funny, or as funny as it can considering Cage only resets when he dies. Cage is at first confused and terrified, then messes with people, then gives in to despair before his increased skill and caring for the warrior Rita (Emily Blunt) leads to determination.

Blunt, by the way, gets to shoot Tom Cruise in the head repeatedly, and who hasn’t wanted to do that?

Despite its subject matter—it’s basically another movie about the apocalypse—“Edge Of Tomorrow” is great fun and certainly action packed. Cruise, who I’m no fan of, is perfect for the role and proves he really can act. Of course, you’d act scared too, if you knew you were about to die—again. Blunt does well, the effects are great, and I loved the supporting cast—especially Bill Paxton, who I actually didn’t recognize. He’s a tough and sometimes befuddled Master Sergeant who delivers one of my favorite lines … although maybe you have to be from the Bluegrass State to truly appreciate it.

Entertainment Value: 3 ¾ out of 4 M&M’s. Being too easily entertained, I’m trying to avoid giving out too many perfect ratings.

Oscar Potential: 2 out of 4 M&M’s. It could pick up a nomination in the effects area, or something along those lines. The acting is pretty good, but would have to be better than perfect for an SF film to get a nomination.

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Years ago I did a review of movies just out on video, which I called “Amateur Armchair Review” because … why not? I stopped because the paper apparently no longer needed the filler, but you really miss me, don’t you? Go on, say it …

Fine. I’m back anyway, because doing a regular review of new movies gives me an excuse to go see new movies. I’m starting late with “Godzilla”, the reboot of my favorite childhood monster movies. Instead of bad dubbing and a guy in a rubber suit we get spectacular effects and excellent production values, but I liked it anyway.

Unlike the last American attempt at the franchise, which I didn’t hate but also didn’t like much, this version has the feel of a Japanese monster movie. That’s a compliment, by the way. The biggest criticism I’ve seen is that the main character just kind of floats through, letting things happen to him. That’s true. At least, it’s true for the main human character.

Aaron Taylor-Johnson is Ford Brody, who reluctantly heads to Japan to bail out his obsessed dad, Joe (Bryan Cranston … why do they never give acting Oscars for monster movies?) Joe is obsessing over a nuclear accident that killed his wife years ago, and it turns out Joe is right that the whole thing is a cover-up … there’s a monster in them-there ruins.

But the monster is not Godzilla, who at 60 was probably convalescing at the Old Monster’s Home. It’s a MUTO (don’t ask), a giant monster that happens to wake up just when our heroes break into the place. What are the chances?

Things go south very quickly and soon Godzilla is chasing the MUTO, because he’s apparently employed by Mother Nature to bring balance back to the Force, or maybe I’m mixing up my franchises. Luckily Brody’s wife, played by Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen’s less scary sister Elizabeth, is safe with their son all the way across the Pacific, in San Francisco. The monsters will never end up there. Will they?

This is not the perfect monster movie, mostly because I’m not getting a cut. It’s true Ford Brody tends to go along with whatever challenge tends to pop up in front of him—and he certainly isn’t as much fun as the 1998 “Godzilla” character played by Matthew Broderick, who along with a great cast was trapped in a movie with no heart. (Could that be related to movie maker Roland Emmerich saying he didn’t like the original Godzilla movies? That’s who you want making one.)

Although Brody manages to save the day in the end—somebody’s day—sort of—I suspect his bouncing around was on purpose. Yes, he’s just trying to get back to his family, and later protect them, but his and all human activity is a subplot. (And sometimes not an interesting subplot.)

This isn’t about humanity, which to the monsters is no more important than ants on the ground being trampled during a fist fight. This is very much about humanity’s helplessness in the face of forces of nature that care not a bit what people do. It’s a dark film, very much a disaster movie, with absolutely mind-blowing special effects. But it brings back the spirit of the original films, in a way that’s hard to explain.

And yeah, for all the destruction, it’s fun. Don’t judge me.

My score, going back to my old review days:

Oscar potential: 3 ½ out of 4 M&M’s, if only for special effects, or the score.

Entertainment value: 4 out of 4 M&M’s. The good green ones.

Next: I slice into the X-Men

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The first two reviews of The No-Campfire Girls are in—and neither includes the phrases “tar and feathers” or “worst story since Gigli”:

http://www.amazon.com/No-Campfire-Girls-Mark-Hunter-ebook/product-reviews/B00K3OS35C/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

Remember, every time you review my books on Amazon, an Angel gets his wings.

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If I could ask a favor of anyone who’s read “The No-Campfire Girls”: Please give me a review on Amazon! Reviews are one way for potential readers to learn about a book. While a great review is—well—great, a good review is certainly … um, good. Remember, a 5-star review is the best, while a 1-star review causes a fairy to drop dead. That’s my story. I mean, that’s my other story. Here’s the Amazon link for the book:

http://www.amazon.com/No-Campfire-Girls-Mark-Hunter-ebook/dp/B00K3OS35C/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1399964804&sr=1-1&keywords=The+No-Campfire+Girls

Remember, 30% of proceeds for “The No-Campfire Girls” go to Friends of Camp Latonka, to offset maintenance costs and keep the camp open. If that doesn’t grab you, just enjoy a fun, fast read about a group of girls in a drought-stricken summer camp who decide to beat a fire ban—by making it rain.

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Slightly Off the Mark

Movie review: Terminator: Dark Fate

book review: Code Of Honor, by Kathryn Shay

Movie review: Shazam!

book review: Rendezvous With Rama

Book Review: Odd Thomas, By Dean Koontz

book review: Game of Thrones, by George R.R. Martin

movie review: Ant-Man and the Wasp

Movie Review: Incredibles 2

Movie Review: Solo: A Star Wars Story

Reviews Are the Lifeblood of Vampire Books

Reviews are Like Chocolate

More Stormy Reviews

Move review: “Edge Of Tomorrow Tomorrow Tomorrow …”

60 Years Old And Still Smashing Cities

Passing in review

Passing in review

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