ozma914 | Recent Entries

Sometimes you just gotta be silly.

Well, I do. People like my humor, but up until now my books have been halves: half humor, half romance; half humor, half history; half humor, half adventure. Although The Notorious Ian Grant looks and feels like a romantic comedy, I felt like ramping it up to the level of my humor blogs, just to see if it would work as well for fiction as it did in the newspaper, back in the day. I think it does. I could be wrong.

The blurb:

When infamous party boy and b-list celebrity Ian Grant learns his sister is marrying a cop, he abandons Hollywood and drives to Indiana. His plan: to make up for all those times he embarrassed his family, by taking charge of the wedding planning. So, Ian’s never planned a wedding … how hard could it be?

But Ian's past has followed along--and may be trying to kill him.

Ian Grant isn’t exactly a type A personality, although he has the looks for it. He’s Cary Grant with a Groucho Marx brain, and he’s not ashamed of it … even if he is ashamed of a "few" youthful indiscretions. Like dancing on Charlie Sheen’s car, drag racing Justin Bieber, and of course peeing on a bouncer’s shoes. (Ian still insists Bieber cheated.) These days Ian’s on a path to redeeming himself—he hopes—but his past keeps coming back to haunt him. Here's a snippet from early in The Notorious Ian Grant, in which he meets two residents of Hurricane, Indiana for the first time:

They stopped by the intersection, where the cop now stared daggers at Ian. “Here, me first.” Beth hopped down from the horse with ease and grace, and once she’d cleared Ian managed a dismount with none of either. As he stumbled away, the animal turned toward him and made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

“Good horsey.”

“His name is Honey,” the cop said, as she stepped around her patrol car.

“Really?” Ian looked back at the horse. “You hear that? All the other guy horses make fun of you.”

Honey turned his head away.

“Hey, I was kidding —“

Beth patted the horse’s flank. “It’s okay, Honey—he’s a scumbag.”

“Beth, sweetie …” Fran (the cop) hooked a thumb toward Ian. “What have I told you about picking up strays?”

“He says he needs to get into Hurricane.” Beth leaned in toward the woman. “His name is Ian Grant.”

“I don’t care if his name’s—oh.” Fran gave Ian an even closer look, if that was possible. “I’ve seen your jail book-in photos.”

“Was I smiling? Could you see my dimples?” Fran had long hair, secured in a tight ponytail, along with big brown eyes and high cheekbones that pointed toward a full Hispanic heritage. She probably had a nice smile. He almost regretted letting his agent talk him out of joining the cast of Lady Cop 3: Hollywood Vice, especially since his agent dumped him weeks later.

“You smiled, but the bloody nose and the missing tooth spoiled the effect.”

“They put the tooth back. See?” Ian gave her his most ingratiating smile, to no effect.

“Very nice. However, around here those trimmed stubbles are not in fashion.”

“I’ve driven for three days —“

“May I ask your reason for being here, Mr. Grant?”

Uh-oh. Official voice.

I love a good sequel.

Ian had better watch himself, because the girl he got a ride from is his future sister-in-law, and the cop is his future brother-in-law’s best friend. Too bad he doesn’t know that yet. That’s one of the fun things about Ian Grant: He really does want to do the right thing—but he just can’t seem to keep his mouth shut.

I wonder if Ian’s trickster spirit might have something to do with why my original publisher released the book a month before I was told they would? In any case, the updated The Notorious Ian Grant is available as print or e-book. It can be found in various formats at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F3KWHWK8

https://www.audible.com/pd/The-Notorious-Ian-Grant-Audiobook/B0F27KVWMF

https://markrhunter.com/fiction

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25393144-the-notorious-ian-grant

I just now realized the cover in this photo is different from the cover as released. Can you tell how?

Current Mood: amused
Current Location: rural Indiana
Current Music: Born to be Wild

Tags:

It's been an incredible month--incredible sometimes meaning incredibly bad--so this is just a flyby photo post; I hope it won't be too much of a turkey.

The only time I ever saw turkeys as a kid was at Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. That's because over-hunting and deforestation wiped them out in Indiana. (For which I plead innocent: Despite my name, I've never hunted. I have cut down a few trees, but never mind.)

But they're back!

I'm sure most of us consider that a good thing, but not necessarily.

You see, despite the famous WKRP In Cincinnati episode, it turns out turkeys can fly. Wild turkeys can, anyway, for up to a hundred yards at 55 miles an hour. I once saw a car come within a few feet of hitting a turkey flying across the road at windshield level, which would definitely have made a mark. I don't think that driver would have been happy with his catch.

The Indiana Department of Natural Resources brought turkeys back, and they arrived in northern Indiana during the 80s and 90s. These days you can find rafters of turkeys in all 92 Indiana counties. (That's the official name for a flock of turkeys. No, I don't know why.)

I took all of these photos in northern Indiana. Most, like the one above, came from Pokagon State Park or the area of Chain O' Lakes State Park. The near-collision I witnessed was about halfway between Kendallville and Avilla in Noble County.

The one above I tried to sharpen, but just made it look worse, and then I couldn't locate the original ... so I left the rest alone. (I mean I tried to sharpen the photo, not the meat carver.)

I also took most of them from near a road, or even from the car. As if deer weren't a danger enough! But I can tell you from experience that if you're on a trail and hear a turkey crashing through the underbrush, it sounds like you're on the wrong end of a Jurassic Park movie. My wife tells me armadillos are just as loud in the woods, and they're expanding in Indiana, too. At least they can't fly. Can they?

There are now some 125,000 wild turkeys in Indiana. But the Hoosier state is also a top producer of domestic turkeys--some 20 million turkeys are produced for consumption annually, just in this state. I hope the wild ones aren't planning a jailbreak--but I'll keep an eye on ham production, just in case.

Having all of our books could be a feather in your cap.

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/"Mark R Hunter"

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/ozma914

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Benjamin Franklin thought the turkey should be our national bird, but he also had a great library.

Tags:

Music. Beer. Buff firemen. Well, some are buff, and we'd prefer to be called firefighters, 'cause it's the 21st Century.

Yes, the Albion Volunteer Fire Department is hosting its first block party, an event which, typically, involves having a party on a block. In this case it's the Noble County Courthouse Square, which is indeed a block. If you want to be specific, it's around the area of Main and York Streets, which--come to think of it--I can see from my part time job.

But I can't have beer on my part time job. Still, I'm betting there will be other beverages there, and besides, most of the people reading this don' t have my job. This is on a Saturday (September 12th), so there'll be plenty of parking in the courthouse square area, too. But if you plan to visit the beer tent, bring a designated parker.

This is where I usually post a link to the Facebook event page, but I can't get it to work properly because FB is dumb. Okay, I probably pushed the wrong button, but the AFD's page is here:

https://www.facebook.com/albionfd

The money raised goes toward, among other things, tools, fitness equipment, and training props. The fitness equipment part is pretty self-explanatory. Let me explain: When we started out in 1888, most members of the department had physical work that kept them in shape. There were butchers, bakers, candlestick makers ...

Well, our first fire chief was among other things a baker, and butchers would make sense--I don't know if we had any candlestick makers. Here is what I eventually determined is the first known photo of the Albion Volunteer Fire Department:

I had this photo for a few years before I realized the little frame building under construction on the right is, in fact, Albion's first firehouse. It took me awhile after that to figure out that the men marching in the white belts are some of the town's first volunteer firefighters, which dates this photo to late 1887. The women behind them? Probably the Ladies Auxiliary, or whatever it was called back then. Their job was to follow along and, if one of the men chickened out and tried to run from the fire, shame them into going on.

It's possible I'm making that last part up.

Back then I would probably have been a candlestick maker, working on my feet all day, walking from place to place, drilling with the fire guys to hand pump the engine, and having earwax problems. I don't know. Wouldn't candlestick makers have wax issues?

Now we need fitness equipment. These are the days of typing on keyboards, riding trucks instead of pulling engines, and drinking beer instead of well water. (We can't actually go to a fire if we've been drinking, which is the main reason why I never took up drinking.)

But when those fires break out, we still have to put on a zillion pounds of equipment and go running toward the flames.

Speaking of beer, there are also those training props we need to pay for. We used to find buildings due to be demolished, and train there on every aspect of firefighting, until it was time to let the place burn down completely. These days it's a lot harder to find a building we can legally beat up for training. The State of Indiana does help out on training resources, but there's the need for us to build our own doors and windows to force, roofs to ventilate, and 150 pound mannequins to haul around.

Should various government entities pay for our training needs? Sure, but in some cases they can't, and in others they won't. Besides, now we can have a block party.

So come over, have a beer, listen to music by Sweetwater All Stars Band, and bring the kids! Not for the beer. For them there'll be a "touch a truck", the fire prevention trailer, and no beer. Enjoy the local cuisine, which is a Greece word that originated in Turkey, meaning food. Oh, and if you wander over to the AFD's booth (let's fill that boot! With money. Duh.), you can buy a beverage Koozie to remember us buy. That might not seem like a big deal to you, but my dispatcher Koozies are getting ragged.

You can find our books, and my alleged humor, all over the interwebs:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: The one thing we’ll never let burn is books.

Current Mood: jubilant
Current Location: The Courthouse Square
Current Music: The Sweetwater All Stars Band

Tags:

Yes, my photo post is late. It's been ... a week. One of those weeks; details are most likely forthcoming. I considered not doing one this week at all, but then I was sent some photos I was happy to share.

Meet Silas Noah. He seems confused. Welcome to reality, Silas.

He would be my sixth grandchild, and ninth if you count the step-grandkids, which I do. That means I have as many grandkids as my father had siblings down in Kentucky, at a time when that was much more common.

I know everyone thinks their offspring is born beautiful, but we all know most babies come out red and wrinkly, and look a little bit like those aliens your crazy old uncle used to go on about. The exception would be my grandkids, who were all born beautiful.

You can tell we're related, because we both like to sleep. A lot.

His big brother had to make a lot of trips down to Riley Children's Hospital (he's fine now), but Silas (or will we end up calling him Noah?) is perfectly healthy. Sure, he might grow up to love Heavy Death Rap Metal--and that might be a thing, by then--but for now he's doing okay.

Shhhhh......

When you need a naptime break, there are always books:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: You never have to change a book.

Current Mood: grateful

Tags:

It's a Brand New Day for Spider-Man, thus the name. And for Peter Parker, a new day always means new problems. Seriously, I'd just give it up and go to work as a dishwasher ... but then he'd get attacked by some kind of soap-sud monster.

Thanks to an ill-advised spell in the last movie, Peter is literally forgotten, by pretty much everybody. Now he's living alone, trying to be a superhero full time (which never works), and his only friend is a police detective who tells him it won't work.

The film opens with a slam-bang chase scene that really doesn't fit with the new Big Bad's methods, but it's oh, so much fun--especially when Spider-Man runs into (literally) Frank Castle, a.k.a. The Punisher. They have a fundamental difference in how hijacked armored cars should be dealt with, as anyone who's seen The Punisher TV show will know.

Meanwhile, Peter keeps running into his old life: specifically his girlfriend and best friend, who awkwardly have no memory of him. But his old life and new collide when they become targets of a mysterious enemy with the power to take over the minds of other people, then jump from one to another to stay one step ahead.

All that emotional stress causes the spider part of Peter's body to get more, um, spiderish. After injuring a cop, he seeks help to control the transformation from a famous scientist: Bruce Banner, who's using tech he invented to keep from turning into the Hulk.

Then, in keeping with any good Spider-Man story, things get worse.

And who does newcomer Sadie Sink play?

Darn good question. Anyone who cares probably knows, but I'll keep this spoiler-free as a tribute to how much fun she had hiding it from the press. Although I haven't watched her in Stranger Things (somebody send me a Netflix gift subscription!), Sink was remarkable here, and hopefully we'll be seeing a lot more of her in the MCU.

The movie's filled with remarkable performances, from the regulars and newcomers. Tom Holland is, as always, a treat as the hapless Peter Parker. Stories with this many moving pieces are hard to put together, but they managed it here. They also keep the humor while pouring on the drama, a difficult balance.

So. This is a great movie. Not just a great superhero movie: a great movie, period, with flaws few are far between. We even feel a bit of sympathy for the main villain, once motives are revealed. If the same movie could somehow be made without the costumes and superpowers, we'd be looking at an Oscar nominee. Any buzz you hear is justified.

My ratings:

Entertainment value: 5 out of 4 M&Ms, the good brown ones. My scoring system, my rules.

Oscar potential: 3 1/2 out of 4 M&Ms. Mind you, it probably won't get a lot of nominations (because, hey, superhero movie) ... but it should.

When you’re done with the movie, you can find ours books online:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Reading is its own kind of superpower.

Current Mood: enthralled
Current Location: the movies
Current Music: Spider-Man

Tags:

We're back from Michigan! I have photos--lots and lots of photos, and some are even good. But it'll take time to sort through them, so this photo blog will be closer to home.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Great title, huh? "Clouds Over Albion" It doesn't have to be about Albion, Indiana--it could be some historical war novel about ancient Britain. I'll save it in my title folder, but in this case we're being more literal, because this week's photo blog is, indeed, about clouds over my hometown. If you click on them, they should get bigger--the photos, not the clouds. At least, that's the allegation.

Sometimes clouds can make a great background for an otherwise normal photo.

Other times, you can just walk out onto the back steps, and they don't need any help.

Sometimes, it's all about the lighting ...

... Or the lack of lighting.

Sometimes they can look threatening, even when the sun is shining.

If you look closely, you'll see the sky on the west side of Albion was full of turkey vultures, even though there was a strong wind blowing.

On an otherwise sunny day, these two cute little guys were hanging out all by themselves. Who knows? They may have sparked a thunderstorm a hundred miles down the road.

In any case, there's almost always something interesting to look at, up in the sky.

No matter what the weather, you can find us in various places online:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Electricity is a thing. You don’t have to reply on the sun to read.

Current Mood: artistic
Current Location: the ground
Current Music: Twister theme

Tags:

I'm not going to be posting this weekend, due to circumstances ... well, not beyond my control. Suffice it to say I'll be busy with the real world, and will give you a full report later.

So, since this is my mid-week photo blog, I decided to go with:

That's right, the 250th anniversary of patriotic horses. No, actually horses in general, and the ones who work up at the Pokagon State Park Saddle Barn in particular. That's where Emily works, in addition to all the time she spends keeping me under control.

I went through all my photos of horses, and narrowed it down to about sixty for a blog that usually has no more than 6-7 pictures. So, I think you can count on seeing more horses in the future.

This photo is over ten years old now, but it's one of my favorite ones of her leading a trail ride. I try not to be obtrusive, and she'll say something to the other riders along the lines of, "He's not creepy, he's my husband". Which doesn't guarantee I'm not creepy, of course.

I just realized, she's not wearing her hat. She almost always has one on, for sun and spider web protection.

The horses get washed ... then they roll again. Emily hates the day right after a rain storm, because even the whitest of horses is guaranteed to be ground colored.

I have to admit, I don't remember most of their names even though whenever I stop by I try to spend a few minutes with each of them. This makes more sense when you realize I also don't remember most human names. I'm also not very good at faces--of either kind.

"I'm ... BatHorse."

Actually it's a screen to keep bugs out of their faces, although I don't have a working knowledge on when they're used, and on whom. I have, however, noticed this horse being shadowed by a robin.

And yes, visitors have been known to ask if the horse is blind. He is not. Or she is not. One of those.

Here's what the actual saddle barn looks like, as the last horse goes in to end the day. They're closed on Tuesdays and Thursdays (except for the occasional special event). The rest of the days the first trail goes out at 10 a.m., and the last one at 5 p.m., barring bad weather or excessive heat.

So, do I ever ride the horses? From time to time, but Emily is usually too busy to take a photo of me. In this case it was kind of a test run for the horse she rode, so she and I were the only ones on the trail.

Ah--there's Emily's hat! Along with some nice, fresh, road apples. Yum.

If various places get too sore for riding, you can always look up our books:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: You can’t get saddled by too many books.

Current Mood: sore

Tags:

I tested a theory this month, and sadly came to the conclusion that I was right. I've learned that my predictions and theories are usually only right if they're bad. Is that pessimism? Come to think of it, I should write a science fiction story about the subject. I could call it The Eeyore Presumption.

"But you probably won't."

Anyway, I'm sure you all know that my novel Coming Attractions has been in the Smashwords Summer/Winter sale for a few years now. My hope was that a whole lot of people would download it for free, and some might leave a review and/or buy some of our other books. I mean, it's free, right?

But Coming Attractions first came out seven years ago, and I've been promoting it the whole time. My rather pessimistic theory is that if anyone who knows or follows me wants to get the book for free, they already have. Social media isn't the promotion platform it once was, and while I see new faces from time to time, all the old faces have had several chances to pick it up.

As I write this, the July promotion is mostly over, and I've moved ... four copies.

Some of you might remember that old expression, "You can't give them away". It's not a complimentary expression.

Maybe what I should do is write a sequel, and use the original as a loss leader (as promotion people put it). I had a side character in mind to be the lead in a second novel, anyway, and I like writing series. I even established in a Christmas short story that the world of Coming Attractions is set in the same world as the Storm Chaser series. Crossover potential?

Well, then ... back to writing. I should be encouraged to hurry by this photo I stumbled across online:

A little spooky, ain't it?

There's still a little time to pick up free and reduced price books over at Smashwords. Here's mine:

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

But we’ll still be selling the soap, in all those old familiar faces:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Free books have value, too.

Current Mood: contemplative
Current Location: the couch
Current Music: the fan

Tags:

Another video, for my midweek photo blog. Because I'm a rebel.

Most of you are aware Canada is burning, either because you follow the news, or you breath. Forest fires are common in the wilderness areas of Canada, and if they're not near any homes or infrastructure, firefighters usually can't fight them--it being the circle of nature, and all that. They're mostly inaccessible, and the resources to battle that many fires at once just aren't there.

YouTube version here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-aHVUO5a70

If the weather is right, the smoke drifts south and you get what we got across the Midwest last week: smoke. It's not even a fun campfire-like scent, because the nature of smoke exposed to sunlight cause changes that give it a nasty, almost factory-like smell.

I'm something of a smoke expert, if I do say so myself (not really, but let's just say I've experienced a lot of smoke). I've been in way worse than this, but it's still not a lot of fun--and it's very unhealthy, of course.

I took this photo during a training fire. Notice everyone has breathing protection.

Emily and I drove to Huntertown Gardens in the smoke, because the doctor told me to eat fresh fruits and veggies or die. It's a tough choice, especially since we had to work our way around three construction areas to get there. But I now have low potassium for some reason, and we were hoping bananas, kale, and potatoes would share their potassium with me.

On the way home, as you'll see in the video, it felt like one of those foggy mornings even though it was early afternoon. That might be why the deer were active: Maybe they thought it was near dusk. We saw two fawn, then a grown up deer ran in front of us on a county road.

The deer responsible for accidents often isn't the first one; it's the second one. So I slowed way down and sure enough, the second ran across the road right in front of us. Have some corn, fellas.

And that's why you get another video on picture day. Between that and the moron in the pickup truck that I posted over the weekend, one has to wonder why Emily and I go out at all. Easy: Otherwise we'd starve. But maybe that whole DoorDash thing isn't such a bad idea, after all.

You can find safer adventures in our books:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: You don’t have to go out to read.

Current Mood: aggravated
Current Location: the clouds
Current Music: Backdraft score

Tags:

Okay, so, for this week's photo post I have only one video. I felt guilty at first, but at least the video will grab attention.

Here's the YouTube link, in case it doesn't show up here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKZBV40hryw

Emily took it off our dash cam. You might remember that camera got a really good view of the terror-inducing moment when our car caused a deer to go from 0 to 60 in one second. The deer lived, although it took a few years off of my life.

I cut this video down to 20 seconds, using an editing program (the kids apparently call them apps) that I learned to use in less than five hours, which is a record. In the video Emily is driving east on SR 8, in the area (I think) of around C.R. 700 East. That big bright thing is, yes, the sun.

Now, you'll notice her pass a construction ahead sign. Then a car traveling in front of her activates its left turn signal, on a hill, in an area that is not only no passing, but double yellow--no passing either way. (It was probably the driver who activated the turn signal, but these days who knows?)

There's a pickup truck behind Emily, being driven by a guy who, from this point forward, will be known as the Stupidest Human On the Planet, or SHOP. This is in no way meant to imply that they're stupid while shopping. They may be very good at price comparing, when their truck is sitting still and the little hamster wheel inside their head is allowed to cool down.

Maybe it was a politician.

It could be that Emily's slowing down because of the car turning in front of her got our SHOP pickup driver all butt-hurt about how he wouldn't be able to set a record for the most fuel consumption in a drive to Wal-Mart. I don't know. But the guy (let's face it, and assume it's a guy) felt very strongly that slowing down would interfere with his constitutional rights.

So he passed Emily. On a hill. On a double yellow line.

Then, as you might expect, the person who was turning left turned left. Just as the SHOP passed them.

If I hadn't watched Emily download the video, and reviewed it multiple times myself, I'd think it was AI. I have never in my life seen two objects actually pass through each other without touching. It was that close. Sure, theoretical physicists say it could happen, but in real life you don't expect a turning car and a moron in a pickup truck to actually pass through each other.

"If I can figure this one out, I'm a shoo-in for another Nobel Prize."

I actually called work to find out if they'd received any 911 calls at the time about a hit and run accident, since the truck kept going and the car went on down the side road. No, they hadn't. We had witnessed a moment that proves, beyond doubt, that angels watch over stupid people.

I feel for our left-turning person, who probably had to wipe a big brown stain from their driver's seat. I don't feel for the pickup driver's imbecilic nitwit twit, who probably just laughed, popped open another beer, and took that as proof that all traffic laws are just suggestions.

I do not want the SHOP pinhead to find out the hard way--too much chance that he'll hurt other people. Would a couple of expensive traffic tickets slow them down? Probably not.

We can only hope that if he does get into a crash, it's with another SHOP.

Don't forget, the e-book of Coming Attractions is still free over on Smashwords! Here's the link:

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

You can also find adventures in our books:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Read after you drive.

Current Mood: aggravated
Current Location: on the road
Current Music: Dukes of Hazzard

Tags:

I decided at the last minute to do a blog for my birthday, which means you'll have to wait until this weekend to get the extended story of the dumbest driver in Indiana.

Steak, broccoli and potatoes for lunch. For supper? Half an ice cream cake divided by two. No regrets.

There were two reasons (for this post, not dumb drivers). First, I wanted to thank everyone who wished me a happy birthday, because odds are I won't be able to thank everyone individually, because the internet's dumb.

Second, I forgot that I wish for the same thing every year, in what some people would call shameless self-promotion, which it is: For people to buy our books and leave reviews ... or at least get a free copy of Coming Attractions on Smashwords.

On my birthday came either the apocalypse or smoke from Canadian wildfires. So my camera caught a bird, or the persona of Death.

I mean, it's my birthday, right? Or, more likely the day after, depending on when you see this. But I did have a pretty good birthday, and the only thing that would make this week better would be a jump in book sales and/or an Amazon or Goodreads review. Or a big, solid block of milk chocolate. Or for the Canadian wildfires to go out.

In any case, thanks again to everyone, and now I'll go back to work editing our 13th book ... which, now that I think of it, should have been reserved for Haunted Noble County, Indiana.

I'm still impressed that I was able to insert the book cover. With technology, I'm not a young man.

The Smashwords link is here:

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

But as always, you can track down our books and/or leave a review at one of our various internets world wide web places:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Readers make the birthday boy smile.

Current Mood: grateful
Current Location: the living room
Current Music: Big Bang Theory

Tags:

There have been a lot of Supergirls.

I fell in love with the first one, who was my age (at the time) and had that cute skirt because, hey, I was an adolescent. I'd have changed my mind if I had to wear it myself. My second favorite was Melissa Benoist from the CW TV show. They were both very much traditional: truth, justice, no killing, all good all the time, just like her cousin Clark.

But that was also the problem with Kara Zor-El: She was a female Superman, and we already had a Superman. I suspect that's why the movie makers took such a hard turn away from the Superman movie.

Success was limited. That's no fault of Milly Alcock, who does a fine job as a damaged Kara who had to watch her whole civilization die, slowly, before being rocketed off as the last survivor of her Kryptonian city. Unlike Clark, Kara experienced the death of everyone and everything she loved, with the exception of a puppy she saves.

Now she's rocketing around the galaxy to planets with red suns, where she can feel the effects of the alcohol she's using to forget her pain. She's a mess, but when a generic bad guy shows up and poisons the dog, she pulls a full-on John Wick and goes looking for him. She had three days to get the antidote, because deadlines are a great trope.

Turns out the bad guy is trafficking women and girls to be wives for his somehow man-only planet, and he doesn't hesitate to kill anyone who gets in his way. Kara's sense of justice emerges along with her desperation. Despite all of her attempts otherwise, she teams up with a young girl (an alien named Ruthye!) She's also reluctant to get help from Lobo, a somewhat mental bounty hunter/god who shows up first for a bounty, then apparently because he just likes to destroy stuff.

Kara could have cleaned up with whole situation in minutes if she had her powers. It just goes to show, drinking is a bad idea no matter what planet you do it on. Meanwhile the bad guys, led by main villain, dog-shooter and frankly forgettable Drom Baxton, have apparently gotten wind of Superman and moved to a planet that's deadly to Kryptonians.

I don't usually do this much plot explaining, but I was figuring some of this out as I wrote it.

None of this means you shouldn't watch Supergirl, but you shouldn't go in expecting a sequel to Superman. This is not a typical superhero story of a world or galaxy endangered; it's just a girl trying to save her dog, and maturing a bit along the way. This Kara is, and I think this is good, a far cry from her cousin, who shows up a few times but (and this is also good) never finds out she needs help.

It's a much more intimate story, a bit too drab for my taste, and the script could have been punched. Still, it was saved by the performances of Alcock, and Jason Momoa as Lobo. I very much hope we see both of them in future DC movies, hopefully with a better script and a more colorful world.

My ranking:

Entertainment value: 3 M&Ms out of 4. I know a lot of hate is being poured on this movie, and with good reason. But as a summer popcorn flick, I really liked it.

Oscar potential: 1 M&M out of 4. Probably less; there are good performances here, but the story was weak.

You can find all of our books under the yellow sun:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Since your eyes don’t shoot lasers, you don’t have to worry about burning books.

Current Mood: geeky
Current Location: up in the sky
Current Music: John Williams

Tags:

I'm interrupting my normal mid-week photo post to give you my normal mid-year free book giveaway from Smashwords:

Cool--my book is right in the ad! It took me an hour to figure out how to do that--even though Smashwords actually sent me the template to use. This is why I write: I'm helpless at anything else.

While we have plans to add more of our books to that platform (we have twelve now, which in my opinion is also cool), it's been kind of an insane year and we're way behind. But for now it's a great chance to get the Coming Attractions ebook for free, right here:

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

Which is cool. I think I mentioned that. (I'm sitting in the air conditioning right now nursing an allergic reaction, so it literally is cool.)

The sale is over soon, so get your copy now! Okay, it goes on until July 31st, but if you wait you might forget, and that would make me sad. What's Coming Attractions about, you say? Well, it's a romantic comedy:

At a dark drive-in movie theater, Maddie McKinley returns from the concession stand, gets into the wrong van, and is tackled by the father of the kids inside. Logan Chandler’s embarrassed about roughing her up, while also intrigued by the beautiful woman from Boston, who came to the movies alone in an expensive dress. But he’s the local businessman leading a battle to save the drive-in from developers—and she’s the attorney sent to make sure it’s torn down.

This young lady demonstrates that it's perfect summer reading.

Maybe you also want to read other sale books. After Coming Attractions, mind you. No problem, because the Smashword summer sale has more free and reduced price books than there are stars in the sky, and I counted, just to be sure:

https://www.smashwords.com/shelves/promos

Compare that with 9,096 stars. Boy, were my eyes tired.

Naturally, you can still find our various books in other places:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Free books cost less than a cup of coffee, although coffee table books can be very expensive.

Current Mood: hopeful
Current Location: the book rack
Current Music: Paperback Writer

Tags:

It's been said a nation has a life cycle, just like people do.

Perhaps our American gestation was the period when European powers first started planting their little colony seeds along the coast of this great continent. The new communities were unorganized, not entirely sure what they were meant for, and prone to doing things like throwing their rattles at the natives and turning New Amsterdam into New York.

Look, it's not a perfect metaphor. Um, simile. Either.

Like cells building themselves into an infant, people came to North America; for religious freedom, for land, for adventure, and sometimes just to be left alone. Even then we were a contrary bunch. As Benjamin Franklin said, "All nations have some citizens with high ideas, some who actually get things done, and some who are full of crap."

He probably said that. Or maybe it was Alexander Hamilton.

I don't remember Benjamin Franklin having earrings.

Our birth was a painful process, especially if you wore a red uniform, or were a Hessian soldier. The British doctor slapped us and then presented us with a bill, at which point we turned around and bit him. He was expecting cash. "Hey, I've been taking care of you for nine months! I protected you from Indians and the French, and all I asked from you in return is taxation without representation."

Our reply:

I've never seen Stranger Things, but that's also what John Adams said.

So we moved out of the house and into our own place. Actually we stayed where we were, maybe in the vacation cottage, and kicked our parents out. Every other nation in the world thought it would never work. It's like we were legally emancipated at the age of three, after spending a whole year throwing tantrums and spitting on our babysitter. Then we called up France and said, "Do you want to come over and play?"

France did, and they brought their toys.

But we got to live by our own decisions, despite our still developing minds. As we grew up, we started fighting with the neighbors and blowing things up.

Then we hit puberty, and our body began to fight against itself. A Civil War, you might say. We wanted to be one thing, but sometimes our actions didn't line up with our words, which is not unusual with adolescents. We had to win that battle within ourselves, to determine what kind of person we would be.

It turns out we had good intentions, although that didn't prevent us from doing stupid things.

Eventually we grew into a strong, capable young person, who generally wanted to be left alone, do their 9 to 5 job, then go home and drink beer. But the world became more complicated, and we were continually called to do our part--sometimes more than our part.

So we waded in and tried to make the world a better place, and sometimes we succeeded. Sometimes we failed. Sometimes we got our noses bloodied and wondered why the heck we were there to begin with. Sometimes we mistreated our neighbors and sometimes we saved them, and every now and then we did both at the same time. Oddly, some of the people in the neighborhood who didn't like us would still ask for our help when they were down and out. We helped them.

Sometimes we made ourselves look a little ridiculous.

As we entered middle age we had to wonder: What were we doing with our lives? What was really important, and what was not? We were of two minds on how to live our lives; sometimes three minds, or six, or a dozen. We started to feel a little creaky when we got out of our red, white, and blue bed in the morning. We started wondering if we were closer to sunset than we were to sunrise.

Now we often sit on the porch, yelling at the neighbors to get off our lawn! We argue with our own family, too: They're too loud, they don't show respect, they show too much respect, they're leaving the door open and letting all the heat out and/or in. Our checking account is in the red, our credit cards are maxed out ...

Then somebody starts yelling and throwing rocks at our windows. Suddenly we're a family again, because if you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us. And you don't want to do that.

So, what's next for us? Twilight years of bland food, bingo, and fighting with Medicare? After all, lots of other people would be happy to take our house over.

But I don't think so.

The United States of America still has life in it, yet. We may have to take some bitter medicine, get back into shape, and have healthy conversations again (imagine that!), but we can still get off that couch and be a strong people. It could be that sunset is really a sunrise.

We just have to face it together.

“Freedom of speech is a principal pillar of a free government; when this support is taken away, the constitution of a free society is dissolved, and tyranny is erected on its ruins."

--Benjamin Franklin

You can find us here in America:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Freedom isn’t free.

Current Mood: hopeful
Current Location: America
Current Music: 1776

Tags:

The American flag means a lot to me. Of course, it's just a symbol--but what a symbol.

And so, I take a lot of photos of it, as I do with anything that interests me.

We line it up for special occasions.

It stands in our cemeteries.

It lines our streets.

It decorates fire trucks.

It flies at half mast in tribute.

It shows us that the States, as suggested in the name, are United.

It's colorful. And you know what? It's beautiful. In the end it's symbolic of the fact that, for all our mistakes and failures, we're still a great nation; full of the kind of people who, like dogs, are the best: mutts.

But do you know what the best thing about the flag is? You can hate it. You can hate what it stands for. You can hate the country it symbolizes, and do you know what will happen to you? Nothing. I mean, maybe you don't want to say it too loudly at a rodeo! But the government's not going to come after you. No gulag. No reeducation camp. This is a country where you're free to hate your country, free to love it, free to not care about it at all.

Of course, individuals have the right to not listen to you, which is exactly what I will do. Um, won't do? But if we have an ounce of reason, we can still live together.

That's what makes us great.

https://youtube.com/shorts/ZGb51mHkkHM?feature=share

https://youtube.com/shorts/1Gv7-477CaA

You can find our books, which never mock the flag, here:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Wave your books proudly!

Current Mood: hopeful

Tags:

Am I qualified to talk about gayism? I am not. For instance, I just used the term “gayism”, which so far as I know doesn’t exist. Hm. Just a sec, Google and I have a date …

I’ll be darned. That word does exist. It seems I’ve danced out onto thin ice already, so what the heck: I’ll strap on some skates. People speak about issues they aren’t qualified to all the time. I once heard a member of Congress use the words “fiscal responsibility”. Sure, they looked very confused, but they said it.

This might be a shock to my gay friends (I probably have more than I realize), but I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about sexual orientation. What got me thinking about it a few years ago was the revelation that singer Barry Manilow is gay. This announcement was met with a communal yawn, followed by, “Just figured that out, did ya?”

Manilow married his manager, who is a guy, and who Manilow had a very close personal relationship with for three decades. It must be convenient, being able to hold work meetings in the Jacuzzi.

I live in a conservative area, so I was interested in what my friends and coworkers would have to say about it. The general consensus: “So?” Nobody cared, except for the occasional “If they’re happy, good for them”. Most average Joes really don’t care about your sexuality, as long as you’re a good neighbor. The people on both sides who have more hard line views are just louder, that's all.

I’m just the straight messenger, people.

(Oh, fun fact I just found out: The word "heterosexual", which many think of as normal, comes from the Greek term "hetero", which means ... different. "Cis", a word for being attracted to the opposite sex, comes from the Latin word cissexual, which means "on the same side of".)

Yes, I'm a friend of Dorothy, even when she's behaving badly.

Anyway, I’d rather not debate anything related to this other than Barry Manilow’s most awesome song. I love Barry Manilow (in an entertainment kind of a way), and I’m not afraid of telling anyone, but please don’t tell anyone.

I love his ballads. I love his energy, and one of my favorite albums (8-track!) as a teen was his amazing live album. I even love his medley of the commercial jingles he wrote.

By the way, I’m straight, even though my wife will tell you I’m sometimes a girl. Also, I love Boston and ZZ Top, and they’re not gay. They’re not, are they?

Yes, I heard rumors Manilow was gay. I wasn’t dating him, just listening to his music. You can question my taste, but sexuality doesn’t matter unless you’re picking out the right pickup bar.

One of my friends in high school was rumored to be gay. He had the stereotypical mannerisms, and you know how people make assumptions. I defended him, because you can’t tell what a person’s like on the inside based on his outsides. Besides, he and I were both in choir and drama club, and if that made him gay, then why did I only go to ball games for the cheerleaders? So there.

Turns out he’s gay.

How do I feel about him now? The same. I mean, he never hit on me, what do I care? And if he had hit on me back then, being the terminally depressed kid I was, I would probably have been more flattered than offended.

Let’s get back to my point, which … let’s see … oh, yeah. I suspect prejudice will end when we stress individuals, rather than color, sex, sexuality, or clothing, although some people wear some really dumb clothes, and can we at least judge them? Those things will always be there, but the world will be a better place if we don’t dwell on them. Are you gay? Are you straight? What do I care? I’m married.

So I came up with an idea—and I’ll admit I originally formed it several years ago. I’ve written a novel, a science fiction space opera. (And I'm still trying to sell it to a publisher, but never mind.)

Would you serve on a starship with this man? Me, too.

Now, I spend a large amount of time creating and assembling backgrounds of my characters. It creates a more rounded, fully realized character when you know about their icebergs: The stuff about them underneath, that you never read about in the actual story.

No literal iceberg involved. Keep up.

So I know their favorite foods, colors, and animals, childhood traumas, hobbies, vacation spots, whatever. For this SF story, I created a supporting character who’s gay.

No, I’m not going to tell you who that character is. I doubt you’ll figure it out, because it has nothing to do with the story. That’s the point. It's not a love story about that character. It’s just a part of who they are, and it has nothing to do with their actions or the plot.

See, that’s the way it should be in real life.

They might not even like Barry Manilow music.

You can find us and our books, which have nothing to do with sexual orientation, here:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: Reading opens the mind.

Current Mood: amused

Tags:

My grand-twins used to look like this:

Now they look like this:

Hunter on the left and Brayden on the right, and a short guy in the middle. Emily changed it to black and white and did the background, which came out really neat. Cool. Sick? Whatever the kids say these days.

Well, I'm just not on board with this. My grand-kids are supposed to be kids, not just turned 18. Nobody consulted with me.

Luckily for me, my younger daughter Jill's kids will, of course, stay kids forever.

Lilli is a power pack, who puts her energy into cheerleading and annoying her siblings.

Willa likes to torment dogs, and just started junior cheerleading herself.

Zander isn't old enough to figure out who he wants to torment yet, but he'll get there.

Then there's Zander's little brother, who we won't be introduced to for another month or two. All but the first of these are from gatherings the step-grand-twins didn't make it to, so I don't have any new photos of them. Maybe next time!

Chocolate fun.

You can find us talking about books, family, weather, and other things that aren’t politics here:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: You never have to change a book’s diaper.

Current Mood: grateful

Tags:

Way back in 2006 the Klu Klux Klan distributed flyers on cars around town, during our annual Chain O' Lakes Festival. The more I thought of it, the more I was reminded of a quote from the movie "Two Weeks Notice":

“You’re the most annoying person on earth.”

“Well, that’s just silly – have you met everyone on earth?”

I don’t know everyone on earth. I don’t even know everyone on American Idol, so I don't like to saddle any group with a character trait. But in the case of the Klan, I’m willing to make an exception.

The Boys in/of White visited Albion in 2006 with their cheerful message of hate and intolerance. You could say they skulked around, since no one actually saw them placing flyers on all the cars (except the black ones). However, since Albion is mostly white, you can see how they could blend in. Very few people of color join that organization, despite the KKK’s nifty free dry cleaning policy.

Now, let’s be fair to the Klan. All they want is a safe, free society for themselves and everyone else who’s exactly like them. Really, how are they any worse than the Nazis, or the Nation of Islam, or anyone who yells "death to (your choice of country here)"? It’s all in perspective: Hitler was nice to animals, and Saddam Hussein used to sing lullabies to small children before having their parents tortured.

My wife, who's part Cherokee, finds this sign amusing. It should be noted the streets were there long before Adolf came along.

Besides, this particular flyer targeted only homosexuality and illegal immigration, so hey – I guess nobody else has anything to worry about, huh?

In some ways, the flyer’s not too different from many others you might find under your windshield wipers. There’s an invitation to subscribe to their newsletter, “Thoughts Under the Hood”, for the low, low rate of $16 a year:

“How to find a good home in an all-white neighborhood! A guide to throwing great parties without letting the riff-raff in! Part 3 of tips for removing blood stains from white clothing!”

Let’s hope no one mixes that newsletter up with “Thought IN the Hood”, which is an entirely different animal. Talk about embarrassing.

There’s also a request for donations, because “We’re not funded by the government” (Finally, the government does something right). They need extra money for hair gel. No, seriously – two hours of burning crosses on a hot night can give a person a serious case of hat hair.

My grandfather didn't slog his way across Europe so these bozos could pull the same crap over here.

The flyer declares: “Notice there is family morals that need to be brought back to our family.” Family morals, but apparently not grammar. How sad. Well, they say Abraham Lincoln was a lousy speller.

Um, maybe this would be a bad time to bring up Lincoln.

Some of the flyer actually made me chuckle, in that ironic way I have just before throwing small objects across the room. The KKK, of all organizations, actually mentions the Pledge of Allegiance? You know, the one that says One Nation – Indivisible – With Liberty and Justice for All? What’s more divisive than the Klan?

Okay, the Presidential race, but otherwise, what? Oh, sure, college basketball – could we get back to the point?

Here’s the part I like the best. This KKK flyer, which is dedicated partially to an anti-gay rant, starts with “The Cape Crusaiders rides once again in the state of Indiana.”

Come on. Everybody knows Batman and Robin were flaming homosexuals. Whoever wrote this thing was having some fun with their Klan buddies, maybe hinting at what he thinks they should really be doing under the sheets.

Maybe we have something in common. I’m against illegal immigration, I’m a patriot, and I think children should be taught family values and good morals. I’m just like those Klan guys in so many ways, including a poor grip on grammar, with one little exception: I think –

No.

I KNOW -- every single person should be judged on their own merits. Their accomplishments, their failings, their crimes, their contributions to or damage to society. If I changed the color of my skin (I’m told that’s now possible), I’d be the same person. Except darker. It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to understand the common sense of that.

Or, in the case of our Men in White, a brain donor.

Speaking of skin color, I find it highly ironic that, at the top of the KKK flyer, is a picture of the American flag – along with the words, “These colors will never bleed”.

Ironic. And sad, because these brain donors didn’t see the irony.

The flag works better with all the colors.

With our books, both the grammar and the message are much better:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/search?attributes.contributorId=13727646

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: A hood is hard to read through.

Current Mood: aggravated

Tags:

I'm about to tell you a story you won't believe. Like all my stories about things that actually happened, it actually happened.

There was a storm coming in, which is not at all unusual during an Indiana summer. A tornado warning had been issued for Kosciusko County, which is the nearest county to our west, so I went out to take some pictures and video of it coming in. The two photos you see here were only enhanced a little--all the light in the sky was from the lightning.

I headed out back wearing sweats and slippers. I figured, what did Mother Nature care? She'd smite me, or she wouldn't. When the storm got closer we went inside to watch the various weather people, while I sent Facebook messages out on my and the Fire Department's Facebook pages. My small attempt to help.

Here's the YouTube version of the video, if it can't be opened here.

https://youtu.be/mOBn6hKPrwA

Since I'm no longer active as a firefighter, weather has become a spectator sport, and like any good spectators we had a snack. Rice, chicken, beans, and cheese.

Hm ... I just now noticed the two photos that came out anywhere near good are almost exactly the same, even though they were taken minutes apart. Sometimes night lighting just isn't good to me.

We'd been watching the national weather channels and local radar, then went to local channels as the storms grew closer. Then something crawled across my hand.

My mind instantly went to one thing, and one thing only: Spider.

But it wasn't. Even as I shrieked and threw the bowl into the air, my mind said, Bee. Oh, okay.

And then, because naturally my hand came slapping down, accompanied by bits and rice and beans, it stung me.

I'm allergic to almost everything nature provides, with the exception (thank goodness!) of food. I'm allergic to spider bites. I've had reactions to mosquito bites, when I get enough of them at the same time. Pollen and mold are my sworn enemies. However, allergy doctors do not normally test for bee sting allergies, unless the patient has had previous reactions. I haven't been stung by a bee since I was a teenager.

But they assumed I was allergic, because of, well, everything, so they gave me an EpiPen to have close by, just in case. It was in the house. Somewhere.

The bee was all black, and crawling on the floor, and I dispatched it with extreme prejudice because I don't like pain. Then I had to decide what kind of bee it was. "What did it look like?" Emily asked.

"Um, a black smear across the carpet."

"Well, there's something still crawling down there."

It was an earwig, which I also dispatched, while keeping one eye on the TV. What the heck? Was the bee carrying an earwig? But no, the answer soon presented itself: They'd hitched a ride on my slippers when I came in from the back yard. Looking for shelter, but all they found was death.

This kind of bee, according to my sources (um, Google) tends to nest in yards and has pretty much the same venom has a honeybee. In other words, I was about to die in a most dramatic way, while a storm raged outside.

At least I managed to catch my bowl, with most of the food still in it. The cheese held everything together, as usual.

But I didn't need the EpiPen. I had, as I usually have, a localized reaction, instead of systemic. The spot on the inside of my finger turned red, swelled, and my whole hand itched for awhile. As I write this, three days later, my finger is itching like crazy, but otherwise all is well.

That's more than can be said for Illinois and Indiana (and other areas), which, like the bee, got smeared under Mother Nature's giant foot. Tornado touchdowns were confirmed in two surrounding counties, but all we got was a thunderstorm warning, as the storm was starting to lose power. It was still pretty darned photogenic, as the weather has been, lately.

Still, I think next time I'll take all my pictures from the porch.

Weather is a common theme in many of our books. Check them out here:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/"Mark R Hunter"

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter

· Substack: https://substack.com/@markrhunter

· Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/ozma914

· Audible: https://www.audible.com/search?searchAuthor=Mark+R.+Hunter&ref_pageloadid=4C1TS2KZGoOjloaJ&pf

Remember: All you need is a book and a flashlight, and you’re prepared for the entertainment part of a storm..

Tags:

The last thing I thought would happen with Hoosier Hysterical II: Crying Out for a Subtitle is that I would run out of space.

Yet a few days ago my planned 53,000 word manuscript for Hoosier Hysterical II: The Wrath of Corn hit 59,610 words. This is a problem. I wanted it to be close to the length of the original Hoosier Hysterical: How the West Became the Midwest Without Moving At All. I also wanted it to have a cool subtitle, although not as long as the first one.

But wait, there's more: I got my word count wrong. Despite the length of the subtitle, the original Hoosier Hysterical weighed in at only 43,023 words, not the 53,000 number going through my mind. I didn't catch it until the sequel's rough draft was finished.

There's a lot of research involved, and I made the mistake of deep-diving. It turns out a few little details at the top of a biography aren't nearly as interesting as all the stuff that comes between the "B" and the "D".

No, that's not the code for bondage: It's "Born" and "Died". Get your mind out of the black leather.

People I planned to spend a few paragraphs on ended up taking whole chapters. Meanwhile, I had no idea how many people of note have connections to the Hoosier State. Did you know Ian Fleming's first pick to play James Bond in the movies was a singer from Indiana?

Or that not only Garfield, but Clifford the Big Red Dog, Raggedy Ann, and Little Orphan Annie were born in Indiana, along with the infamous Dick and Jane from the early reader books? Or that Ohio may have birthed more astronauts, but we educated them? Or that the Governor of Indiana saved President Lincoln from getting kidnapped?

Neither did I.

56,000 words doesn't seem like much: George R.R. Martin’s last Game of Thrones book had so many words that, if laid end to end, they’d reach the orbit of Jupiter. Still, that's a 13,000 word difference, and yes, I counted them individually. I've often wondered if the reason my second Slightly Off the Mark humor book didn't sell as well as the first is because it was much longer; now I'm facing the same thing.

So here's my plan: I'm going to divide this book up into two. One would concentrate on people, the other on items, inventions, and events. For instance, Katherine Bailey was born in Marion and died in Indianapolis, so she would be here. The incident in which President Van Buren’s buggy overturned in Plainfield, after he vetoed a bill that would have improved the road, would be in Hoosier Hysterical III: Here We Go Again.

Or whatever it ends up being called.

Look up our humor, history, and other books at many of your favorite Mark R. Hunter locations:

· Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO

· Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/"Mark R Hunter"

· Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4898846.Mark_R_Hunter

· Blog: https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/

· Website: http://www.markrhunter.com/

· Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ozma914/

· Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkRHunter914

· Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markrhunter/

· Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkRHunter

· Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@MarkRHunter