It's SO cold ...

SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK

 

            You’d think this weather would be perfect for “it’s so cold” jokes.

            You know: It’s so cold I saw a dog frozen to a hydrant.

That’s an old one – let me try to come up with something of my own:

It’s so cold hot wings are being sold on Popsicle sticks.

It’s so cold the weather made me reminisce about some of my ex-girlfriends.

It’s so cold, Miley Cyrus put her clothes on.

Or this one that I just came up with: It’s so cold politicians are starting to look warm and friendly.

Now you know why I don’t do stand-up.

 

( They’re probably all variations on jokes someone already came up with. Besides, this being Indiana, it could be in the 50’s when you read this. But as I wrote it the temperature was minus 15, so I think I’m justified in saying it’s so cold they canceled Cleveland. The whole city. They just canceled it. And nobody else noticed. )