East Coast Earthquake Makes Washington Wobble

SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK
 

 We jest about what some consider an overreaction to the earthquake that hit America’s east coast August 22, but I think we should take it very seriously. After all, disaster planners will tell you this kind of catastrophe can happen in the unlikeliest of places, and we need to make a plan.

For instance, what would happen if an earthquake hit Washington, D.C., and the whole city simply slid into the ocean? How would we deal with this news? Do we have a plan? Who’s bringing the pizza? Will it be a wet bar, or BYOB? Will there be dancing, or will we all gather around the TV to cheer?
 
Most important, what the heck am I going to do with this column if Hurricane Irene comes along and really does level Washington? (It hasn’t come ashore yet as I write – darn deadlines.) It would be tasteless, especially since one would assume the politicians would be out of harm’s way, and the only people hurt would be the regular guys and gals who keep the city running.
 
( Still, one can’t help but fantasize about the idea of a crack opening right under the Capital building. We’d be left with something similar to what jack Nicholson said in Mars Attacks: “I want the people to know that they still have two out of three branches of the government working for them, and that ain’t bad”. )